Thank you Comedy Central...

I owe a debt of gratitude to Comedy Central for providing a needed distraction to my cracked and very painful nipples.  Thank goodness Steven Colbert and Revenge of the Nerds could provide a nice laugh for me while I'm feeding my son.  Yesterday, Baby P ate 13 times.  That's a lot of times to feed a baby, so no wonder my poor boobs are mad.  Also, I'm not surprised I feel like a barely functioning person since I only get to sleep in increments of time that are usually less than 90 minutes. 

There really is more of a point to this post than me complaining about sore boobs, spending 1/2 my day feeding a baby, and sleeping in intervals of time that should only be used to torture people.  I want to describe my meeting with an angel otherwise known as Kim, the lactation consultant.  I've known that Baby P and I were doing something wrong in the breastfeeding department for about a week.  I'm not a first-time breastfeeder, so I was not expecting to have any issues. However, that hasn't been the case this time.  I've had incredible pain (like daggers) for several days and I knew that it wasn't just cracked skin.  It was so painful that I would have to do meditative breathing just like when I was in labor (with no epidural) every time I fed him and I usually ended up sobbing by the end.  With encouragement from my midwife and husband, I contacted a lactation consultant, Kim with www.breastfed.biz.  

Lucky for me, Kim was able to see me on the same day I called.  I met with her yesterday and found out that my sweet baby had too shallow a latch.  My cracked nipple is the result of the poor latch.  On top of that, he's a grazer (which I already knew, considering he was falling asleep after about 10 minutes), so the sheer number of feeds was also contributing to my pain.  His grazing was not emptying milk completely, so my milk ducts were stretching and causing more pain.  Eventually, this would have effected my supply, because my body would have assumed that I didn't need all that milk.

Kim was so helpful right from the start.  She was able to show me how to get him to latch on in a different way that would help him get a better mouthful.  She also showed me a more effective way to do compression or what I like to call how to "milk" myself while feeding him.  It took about an hour and we had to repeatedly wake him up to keep eating, but it seemed to work.  He slept for 3.5 hours afterwards.  It's a lot of work to feed him like this and it takes a long time.  I'm willing to put in the effort.  I breastfed my daughter until she was 19 months old and I truly believe that it was one of the best things that I have done in my life.  It's easy to give up while it's really tough, but in all reality, the hard part of breastfeeding doesn't last very long.  If you are having trouble, ask for help.  Lactation consultants are wonderful.  Once you and the baby both get the hang of breastfeeding, it's pretty easy, so beneficial for you both and so rewarding.

Here's hoping that in the near future, I will sleep in 3 hour increments!

Confessions: Sometimes I Want to be a Quitter

Occasionally, I feel a twinge of selfishness and I really want to quit breastfeeding.  Even though, we've been doing it for 20 weeks strong, sometimes, it seems a little overwhelming to keep going.  
Why? you ask...well...

• Last night, when the baby woke up at 4 am, I really wanted it to be my husband's turn to feed the baby. 
• I haven't been pumping enough at work for a day's worth of bottles and my frozen milk stash is dwindling faster than I expected.  
• Sometimes, I actually feel like my boobs are asking for a vacation day. 

I am not going to quit.  I probably feel this way because I am stressed about things that aren't really very important and won't matter in a few weeks.  I am sure I'm not the only one who has felt like they might want to stop.  Today, I just watched my baby eat and thought about how good it makes me feel to do this for her.  

  

Bottles and Cans

Just clap your hands, just clap your hands...no, actually I'm kidding, this is not a post about cans, or Beck, just about bottles and breastfeeding.

I am very happy to say that getting Baby A to take the bottle was a much smoother transition that I feared.  I've been back to work for 5 weeks now and she's doing great.  It took some work with Grandmas and Grandpa, but she was prepared to eat by the time she went to the babysitter's house.  This was such a huge relief!  I'm glad my baby is not starving!!

I am so glad that she is taking the bottle, but I have to tell you, I really hate washing bottles.  Why does the bottle brush have to spray water all over me every time I pull it out of a bottle?  Why did I pick bottles with lots of pieces to be washed (Dr. Brown's)?  Thank God that most of her feedings don't require any cleanup, unless I start leaking!  

It's not just for the lack of clean up that I prefer breastfeeding, it's also 1000 other reasons (which most people can probably list).  I really am thankful that it has worked out so well for us.  Today, it dawned on me that we are getting closer to the day when she won't be exclusively eating breastmilk and it made me a little sad.  I don't want to give the impression that I totally love being at the mercy of a liquid and a baby's appetite. I definitely have moments when I look forward to my boobs being just themselves again, but I feel blessed to be able to do this for my daughter.  For me, the time and energy that it takes to continue to breastfeed after returning to work has been 100% worth it and 100% rewarding.